"Sing, sing a song..."

"Sing, sing a song
Sing out loud
Sing out strong
Sing of good things, not bad
Sing of happy, not sad

Sing, sing a song
Make it simple to last
Your whole life long
Don't worry that it's not
Good enough for anyone
Else to hear
Just sing, sing a song

La la la la la
La la la la la la..."

Okay, it's time to fess up.  Yes, I love Joni, Dan, James, Jackson, Carly, Bob, Jim…all things folk.  But in high school I was a closet Carpenters fan.  Karen Carpenter and I shared the same vocal range.  Low.  Only she had range…I just had low.  So, I sang her songs constantly while I was walking alone in the woods, mucking out a horse stall, or hanging baskets and baskets of near frozen laundry on the clothesline in the bitterly cold January snow and wind.  Might I sense some personal trauma over having ten people in our family and no clothes dryer??? Not to worry, today I actually miss the scent of stiffly frozen towels in my arms after a long day of drying in the winter sun.

Anyway…once I started teaching elementary school and having children of my own, I learned that the above "Sing a Song" could be called up the moment a fifth grade boy decided to describe some disgusting thing in order to gross out the teacher, me…and any other girl with a weak stomach.  It became a joke in the classroom.  If I jumped to the end of the chorus and started singing "La la la la la…la la la la la la…" at a louder volume than the offending student was talking, it was a cue that I didn't want to hear it.  Or that I would be making a bee-line for the girls' room.

Now I have twin fifth-grade daughters who take great delight in describing yucky, disgusting stuff.  And "La la la la la…la la la la la…" still works when I don't want to hear what Billy Joe Bob did with his peas and carrots in the school dining room. 

It's also good for interrupting any endless loop of thinking that gets a foothold in my thought and won't let go. 

Last week my Bible study was focused on a number of scriptural reminders to "sing a new song."  This intrigued me.  How often do I let an old song play over and over again in my head.  Sometimes it is a seemingly harmless "old song" that I find myself chanting almost mindlessly. A little ditty like, "Why get a headstart on that project…you've always done your best work under the pressure of a deadline" or "of course you're obsessed with getting it right, you're the oldest child in your family."  But sometimes it is not as easy to recognize these songs as particularly negative. The old song…is just old.  It's a perfectly good song, but it's one that has become so comfortable and familiar in my head that I am no longer thinking about what I am singing. Often these are songs that were once prayers, but have become more like a well-worn blankie I curl up with rather than a refreshing new perspective on life, love, purpose…being.

Even these perfectly wonderful old songs sometimes need to be replaced with a "new song."   A  song that wakes you up to who you are today…rather than offering you a look back through the softly filtered lens of the past. Perhaps even back to a time when those old songs came alive…perhaps during a long siege – a health, financial, or personal crisis that was eventually healed…and they were fresh and new and brought needed peace, comfort, hope, and comraderie.  And as wonderful as I felt when I first discovered that version of a song, or learned those particular chords, what I need today is the demand of learning and discovering a something new about myself and my relationship to the laws of  music through a new song.

So today I am trying to remember to really listen to what is "playing" in my head…and in my heart.  To be conscious of what I am singing along with as I go about my day.  Am I replacing the endless loops of "old songs" in my head--some of which may indeed look, sound, and feel like beloved old inspiration…well-worn insights, prayers, or perspectives--with a new song?  I want to learn new words.  And when a loved old song starts to play, I hope I can at least find a new way to sing it.  I am looking forward to fresh inspiration about what the lyrics are trying to say today…instead of congratulating myself on already knowing all the words.

"…Don't worry that it's not
Good enough for anyone
Else to hear
Just sing, sing a song…"

Kate