"Look inside you and be strong..."

"There's a hero if you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid of what you are.
There's an answer if you reach into your soul
and the sorrow that you know will melt away

And then a hero comes along
with the strength to carry on
and you cast your fears aside
and you know you can survive.

So, when you feel like hope is gone
look inside you and be strong
and you'll finally see the truth
that a hero lies in you..."
- Mariah Carey
"A Hero Lies in You"

His given name, Rolihlahla, meant "troublemaker", but who would have guessed that this boy whose father died when young Rolihlahla was nine years old, would go on to become a "Hero," not only to his tribesmen, but to  millions of fellow Africans, world leaders, the poor, oppressed and imprisoned...and to one young mother 10,000 miles away...among countless others.

Rolihlahla, re-named Nelson as a child by his teacher, would later quote, in his Inaugural address this passage from Marianne Williamson's "A Return to Love":

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

This could be a long story about my journey to South Africa, finding my way through the labyrinth of apartheid-based sanctions, bureaucracy, and red-tape...while adopting our daughter...and finally emerging, having somehow fallen in love with a country gripped in sadness, civil war, and fear...but I will leave that for previous and future posts.

This is a tribute to a man who was once a boy called "troublemaker." A man whose dignity in the face of humiliation, courage in the midst of danger, and love in spite of hatred, changed the world we live in and gave us another hero to refer our children to when encouraging them to "play big".  I often wonder who inspired those have continued, through their humble persistent humanity, to inspire millions.

The following "backstory," by journalist Faye Bowers,  appeared in last week's Christian Science Monitor:

Running Into Mandela at the Monitor: On June 24, 1990, I emerged from the underground parking garage at the Christian Science Center in Boston to find three tall black men circling the reflecting pool. I stood completely still. As he saw me recognize him, Nelson Mandela broke into the most gracious smile and waved at me. He was on his first, historic trip to America. The day before, hundreds of thousands of people had turned out to see him on the Esplanade, along the Charles River, to celebrate his recent release from a South African prison. Now he said he wanted to see the place where that famous lady (Mary Baker Eddy) started her own religion as well as newspaper.

"Wait right here," I said, too loudly. "I'm going to get the editor of the Monitor. He needs to meet you." I sprinted to the newsroom and told Dick Cattani to come downstairs, come meet Mandela. He insisted on putting on a jacket. It was Sunday, and he was dressed casually. I pulled him by the arm as he slipped into his blue and white pinstriped seersucker jacket. He gave Mandela a tour of The Mother Church, as well as a copy of "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" (by Eddy), which Mandela insisted he sign. He mentioned during the visit that the Monitor was the only international paper he had been allowed to read in prison, although major parts were redacted. He marveled that a woman not only started this paper but this religion, noting it could only happen in the US.
-     Faye Bowers

  I remember hearing this story related by Dick Cattani,  just after it happened.  I rejoiced in the role Mary Baker Eddy's vision for international journalism that "injures no man, but blesses all mankind" would play in the life of my hero.  I was moved that he would seek out her "homeland".

In actuality, it was her paper that led me to South Africa 21 years ago...it is her paper that continues to remind me that we are not alone in lighting our one candle and cursing the darkness.

In referring to Mandela's extraordinary courage, my friend Susan Dane writes in her compelling, "When All Systems Fail":

"A man is imprisoned in South Africa for the color of his skin and for his attempts to bring racial equality to his country.  His is seen as a threat by one side of the political debate, and as a liberator by the other side.  While the two sides come to blows, burning and killing each other in mutual hatred, the man dedicates twenty-seven years of his life to not being what everything in him and outside him are encouraging him to be.  He chooses instead to undertake the journey of unreasonable freedom.  He dedicates all his time and energy to getting rid of (in his own words) 'the poison of hatred in my own bloodstream.'

This is a big task since he lives with and within the narrow concrete walls that hatred itself has constructed for him.  Everywhere he turns he is reminded of the power of oppression, and the power of evil to triumph over good.

Did he make the hatred?  Did he deserve it?  Did his bad Karma destine him to a life of suffering, to spend what could have been a full and happy life hopelessly condemned instead?

This man was smart.  He chose to focus on different concerns:

He worked to see that he was not his circumstances, and he worked to not react to them.

He fought to not become entangled by questions like "why" and "why me?"

He fought instead to make sure that no matter what happened around him, it could not happen to him.

And he refused to buy into the propaganda that he could change,if only something else or someone else would change first."

As we strive to live heroic lives in small ways, what can we learn from this man's decision about where he chose to align his focus.  How can we make choices that will inspire others to dream big and live lives of courage and grace.

Could being a hero in one's own life...and the lives of those we love...be as simple as the next choice?

Dane goes on to say:

"Here was a man who was not allowed to read a newspaper for sixteen years, who was not allowed to have a family member visit, and who did hard labor during that time. And yet in spite of this oppressive environment, he dedicated himself to being king in the one place where he could still be king, the one place no oppression could reach him...in the desires of his heart and the intention of his will.  And to do this he had to not be what everything in him and around him argued he must be - a victim...

The result was that this man could not be hurt.  Could not be bent.  Could not be pushed or broken.  Not in any real sense.  Because the Chooser in him was inviolable.  The Chooser in him, the king and kingdom of his self, was Truth [God or Spirit] having its way...His circumstances could not define him, because he had decided to define himself instead.  An entire oppressive government could not bend him to its will.  In fact, the oppressive government succumbed to him."

This is just one very powerful example of how our seemingly small, moment-by-moment choices can become the substance of heroism and nobility, and leadership.

"It's a long road when you face the world alone;
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold.
You can find love if you search within your self
and the emptiness you felt will disappear.

And then a hero comes along
with the strength to carry on
and you cast your fears aside
and you know you can survive.

So, when you feel like hope is gone
look inside you and be strong
and you'll finally see the truth
that a hero lies in you
that a hero lies in ... you
that a hero lies in.....you."

It all starts with small choices...or as Mother Teresa would one day say:

"We can do no great things, only small things with great love."

There is greatness in each small thing...each small choice...made with great love.  What choices will you make today...and in doing so, what will you discover about your own potential for greatness?   A hero lies in each of us...a hero lies in...you.

With Love,

Kate
Kate Robertson, CS

"Let God be the hero in your story"

"…It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth,
of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.

Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings…."
- Henley/ Silbar

Last week I was reminded of an epiphany I had at camp years ago.  This recent reminder came as a gentle, but firm, rebuke. 

And of course, it started with a song.  No surprise I'm sure.  Whenever I've heard the lyrics to Bette Midler's "Wind Beneath My Wings" in the past, one of two things came to mind.  Either I thought about it in reference to someone (or even something) in my life - a friend, loved one, parent, sibling, a particular organization, perspective or system – who had been there for me…who had made a difference at one time or another…in my story.  Or, I am embarrassed to say, I thought about how much I wanted to really live my life in a way – nobly, courageously, generously – that would allow me to be "the wind beneath" someone else's wings.

I know…sad…but true.  I am a bit slow on the uptake sometimes! Now it's been quite a few years since I've thought about this song…I don't listen to soft-rock radio, haven't been to a wedding reception with a live cover band, and "Beaches" hasn't been on the late night movie channel…or at least I haven't had the opportunity to know about it. 

But that said, I don't know that I would have heard it any differently....  

That is, until last week when the thought came, out of the blue,  "Let God be the hero in your story…in fact, Let God be the hero in everyone's story." Now, Susan Dane, in her book "When All Systems Fail" says, "In the movies, we get to be the heroes. But in the story of spirituality, God does." However, this wasn't what God said to me last week, His angels simply whispered the above, "Let God be the Hero in your story, in fact, let God be the Hero in everyone's story."

Hmmm…right up until that moment I thought I was doing just that. But I have long-since learned that I can always do better at surrendering my own sense of having "accomplished" something. So I stopped in my tracks and actually pondered the message with an open heart. And in that space of hungering for something fresh and new, like opening the windows in a stuffy room and having the winds of Sprit blow through clearing out the cobwebs, I was reminded of an experience I had almost 20 years earlier at camp.  I was there for counselor "training school," as well as a couple of youth sessions that year, and had the opportunity to participate in some of the training workshops. 

One was a session on low-impact camping that my friend Mark James was giving.  It was all about "leave no footprints"…meaning, as much as possible leave as little of yourself on the trail as is humanly possible.  Take out your trash, disturb as little ground, return to civilization having left the forest as you found it. 

As a spiritual healer this became my model for being invited into someone's "life" and being asked to give treatment.  I wanted to go in, when invited, give treatment, and tiptoe out…without leaving any of "me" behind.  This meant that I talked as little as possible…and listened more...to God...and to the patient.  It was my job to point out God's constant, still (never-the-less) presence in their lives, and turn their gaze in that direction…instead of looking at me.  That I would leave "without a trace" of Kate. 

I love that God sends us angel reminders to keep us honest in this work.  It's always such a bittersweet joy to be reminded that we can do better. And if you know my relationship to chocolate...I'm all about bittersweet.  And this angel message was just that a reminder to "do better."  

"Let God be the hero in their story" was such a gentle way for God to hold my hand in this work, and coincides, for me, with the story of Jesus healing of the woman with an infirmity.  The Bible reports that "immediately she was made straight, and glorified God."  Some years ago, I looked up the word "immediate" and it said "without medium."  This made such sense to me in light of my desire for a "low impact camping" approach to spiritual healing.  That Jesus healed without being the medium for the person's relationship to God was so clear in light of his gospel message, "The kingdom of God is within you."  It also made perfect sense to me that following the healing, they would glorify God…not Jesus.  He had already tiptoed backwards out of the clearing like a Indian maiden in deerskin moccasins…not even a dry leaf crackling under foot. 

Couldn't this also be, I asked myself,  what he meant when he is reported as having said, "The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father do…"?

For me, that is my job…to see what the Father is doing.  It's like walking into a room full of people (or even just one person) and not saying a word, but staring at a beautiful painting on the wall.  Eventually, one by one, everyone starts looking at that same painting.  My job is to go in and just transfix my gaze on the presence of God that I am sure is there in (and as) someone's life.  The "first faint morning beam" of goodness, affection, grace, strength, purity…that is always present.  And patiently wait while their "eyes" focus on that same presence of God with gratitude and appreciation.  And when we appreciate something (are grateful for it, recognize and give thanks for it's worth in our lives…however faint a glimpse it might be) it appreciates (grows in value…like your money in an interest bearing account…or the value in your home when it appreciates). 

Once they are focused on the already presence of God, good in their lives…and they see it appreciate to the full-noon of a risen day (the complete sun was always there) I can tiptoe out the door and leave them transfixed on God….or as is says in the Bible, "glorifying the God of Israel."

This was particularly helpful the other night when I did something careless and injured myself quite severely. I was quick to make myself the villain in my story. I had been in a hurry, not paying attention, you know how it goes. But in a moment rife with self-rebuke the thought came again, "Let God be the Hero in your story." I was at first puzzled, I wasn't even thinking about a hero. But then I realized that what I had been thinking about was me as a careless villain. I had also assigned myself the role of being someone who either needed to find a hero to make it better, or become a hero in my own story by praying more effectively. Once again, that angel reminder stopped me cold. Ahh, God was always present in my life as the only hero, the only Mind controlling my thoughts, motives, and actions...and there were no villains. Even my silly self. Within moments of that thought I became more peaceful...and found my first moment of freedom from the extreme discomfort I had been experiencing. And right on the heels of this realization, my husband arrived on the scene. He expressed such a calm, gentle love and was so patient in helping me care for the injury. I think it was very clear to us both that he was not the Superhero, but a great sidekick...a great witness to what the real Superhero was doing all along. I slept pain-free and peacefully that night and by the next morning I was moving freely.

So…I have been gently rebuked, carefully reminded, and am deeply grateful.  It is a joy to let God be the hero in my story…and in everyone else's story too.

"Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings…."

with love for the Hero in everyone's story...
Kate