"May the Lord...."

"May the Lord protect and defend you.
May He always shield you from shame.
May you come to be
In Israel a shining name.

May you be like Ruth and like Esther.
May you be deserving of praise.
Strengthen them, Oh Lord,
And keep them from the strangers' ways...".
- "Sabbath Prayer
from "Fiddler on the Roof"

So, here it is, Dayenu Part Two (if you haven't read the previous post - scroll down to the next article below this one - it might help to understand what I am talking about)...it was like God said, "Okay, you think this is so easy...time to head into the lab and do some real scientific application of this law of Dayenu. 

I failed.  Miserably.

Monday morning I wrote the earlier post below, "Dayenu....it would have been enough" and Tuesday morning all hell broke loose.  Or so it felt.  The battery on my alarm clock must have run out of enough juice to keep accurate time somewhere in the middle of the night, but a phone call came in only 5 minutes after what I had set the alarm for and I was fully awake in seconds...Dayenu...even if God had only intervened and woken me up on time...it would have been enough!

The girls started in on eachother at the breakfast table, but at least they were dressed and ready to head out the door...Dayenu - it would have been enough!

I won't drag this out...

We finally got backpacks, lunches, band instruments, and clothed, shod, fed, and brushed daughters (not horses) out the door and into the car....Dayenu.

As we backed out of the driveway and headed down our little lane towards the main road to school I remembered that I didn't have my cellphone - so grateful for the divine reminder...Dayenu.

As we backed up, quickly returning to our driveway, Emma noticed a stream of water pouring out from under our car. She pointed it out to me.  I was so grateful. We were close to home, able to pull back into our driveway - at this point you should read, "oh my gosh, I am so glad we were not broken down on Clayton Road, with me in my nightgown and just a parka over top. Oh, and sweatpants pulled on hastily....Dayenu...BIG Dayenu.

We walked back in the house and I immediately picked up the phone to call the girls' dad. He assured me that he could come pick them up so they wouldn't be late for school - he was on our doorstep in less than 15 minutes...Dayenu.

I called my husband who is on assignment in another city, he picked up his cell phone immediately and within minutes he called me back having arranged for AAA to come tow the car, and for the repair shop to accept it into their queque, bumping it up in their list of urgent need cases....Dayenu.

But that's about where my Dayenu resevoir started to sputter....I lost it when I couldn't find the extra set of keys to send with the AAA driver.

You would think all those Dayenus would have me singing "El Shaddai" in the shower, but no.  It had me bawling my eyes out while my husband sat speechless on the other end of the phone in Boston.

I couldn't see beyond the empty hook where my keys should have been. 

Something in me forgot that God was with me and that He, God, always had the best interests of His children at heart.   I forgot all the cases of precedence set by Hebrew families escaping the tyranny of Pharoah's Egypt, the bravery of a boy with five smooth stones facing Goliath of Gath, a pregnant young girl with only an angel's message to strengthen her resolve, and a boy with a mission to heal and save.  I forgot.  And because I forgot, I felt alone and frightened.

As each seemingly insurmountable - at least to me in my state of terror - challenge presented itself over the ensuing 24 hours, I battled...and held at bay...those fears, but without the natural joy and confidence that comes from looking back at how good God had already been to me, and mine, and all the children of the Most High he had cared for through the centuries.

And it was getting worse....

I had lost my focus on Dayenu, and was looking around every corner anticipating the next "surprise," trying to anticipate how I would collect the chiilden from school, get to church, visit patients, buy groceries. Thank goodness for the kindness of a dear friend....again, and again, and again.

But finally I had a sweet breakthrough...or should I say God broke through my myopia. 

I was walking to the Starbucks near our home for an "office" appointment, and as I reached the curb - pushing the button that would briefly stop busy traffic so that I could cross safely - I felt this overwhelming surge of "Dayenu...it would have been enough!" gratitude for that crosswalk signal.  It was an extremely cold day, I was not as well prepared for how the wind would affect my perception of temperatures as I should have been...and it was bitterly cold.  I was so grateful that, "Even if all this day held for me was a very quickly responding crosswalk signal, Dayenu....it would have to be...but no, that's not what the word means...Dayenu means "it would have BEEN enough".   The word Dayenu stands at the other side of the Red Sea and says..."Wow, even if we had only made it here...but we didn't, we made it all the way across on dry land because the sea split....but even if it hadn't, it would have been enough."

I needed to trust that verb tense...I needed to see myself on the other side of the Red Sea looking back at two walls of water on either side of a dry path through the sea's sandy, shell-strewn floor collapsing and returning to a living, life-suppporting, healthy sea full of whale, porpoise, crab, kelp, and sea anemones. 

So I started over...."Dayenu, even if all God did was save me from finding myself on the side of the road in my nightie and parka...it would have been enough!" But that wasn't all...it never is!

No matter where you find yourself in any given moment, remember how far God has already taken you, see yourself on the other side...whether the other side is a bright morning after a long, dark night of pain and sorrow, the unforseeable resolution to a seemingly endless series of financial woes, the peace that follows a tsunami of fear and worry...see yourself there, looking back at the Red Sea He has parted, and will always, part for you. 

Dayenu is a Sabbath prayer....the sabbath worshippers were celebrating the Passover...the Shabbat meal.  The celebration of "And the Lord saw all that He had made, and behold it was very good.  Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them."  How could I have missed that.  Dayenu was a benediction....not a prayer of petition.

Dayenu...it would have been enough...again.

with love,
Kate

"Dayenu....it would have been enough..."

"Even if all He did was bring us out of Egypt.
Dayenu - it would have been enough!
Even if He had only  split the sea for us.
Dayenu - it would have been enough!
If He had only led us through on the dry land.
Dayenu - it would have been enough!
Even if He had only provided for our needs
in the wilderness for 40 years.
Dayenu - it would have been enough!
Even if He had only fed us the manna.
Dayenu - it would have been enough!"

I was running, more than a bit, late for church on Sunday morning...not a good idea when you are supposed to be co-conducting the service...and once I finally got in the car, I turned the radio on, only to catch the very tail end of NPR's "Faith Matters."  Since they haven't put the February 1st program online yet, I don't have precise details about the name of the guest, or even why she was the guest...so please forgive me. ...but, what matters most for this post is what she said in those last few moments. A word that has stayed with me ever since. 

She was funny. And her comments were compelling. I believe that she said her childhood faith was Judaism...I think she even may have suggested, at one point, that she was an agnostic, but followed it, chuckling, that if she were to believe in a God at all, it would be the Jewish God...but this wasn't the important part.  It was what she shared next, that stuck with me. It was the word, "Dayenu" [phonetically: di ay nu]

Wikipedia defines Dayenu as a Hebrew word, or concept, that means, approximately, "it would have been enough for us" or "it would have sufficed."  It is also the title of a Passover celebration song, an adaptation of the traditional lyrics are listed above. It is a song that is over one thousand years old.  According to Wiki, and the "Faith Matters" guest, "Rachel" this song is about being grateful to God for all the gifts that he gave the Jewish people, such as taking them out of slavery, giving them the Torah (the law) and Shabbat (the sabbath rest). It is a recognition that even if God had only given one of His gifts, it would still would have been enough. 

I don't know how much of the program was left at that point, because I was deep in reverie.  I was writing my own Dayenu song.  Even if God had only given me the promise of motherhood, showing me that He had faith in my capacity to love by letting me become a teacher, it would have been enough.  Even if He had only given me the gift of adopting our first daughter, it would have been enough.  Even if God had only given me one moment of being loved the way my husband loves me, it would have been enough.  Even if God had only given me one sister/girlfriend who understood my heart, it would have been enough.   But....and the list of all the heaped on blessings from my uber-generous Father-Mother God goes on and on and on. 

I was lost in gratitude for how much I had been shown of His face, Her love in my life.  Gone was the stress of rushing out the door, worrying about whether I would have the "welcome to our service" sign on the sidewalk in time, the hymn numbers written on the whiteboard, the order of services in order.   I was in the space of Dayenu.

As soon as the program finished...so that would have been about 10AM...I realized that my gas tank was beyond empty.  The warning light had gone on three days earlier on my way home from office hours at the college, and although I hadn't driven far, my Jeep is a very thirsty girl.   I started looking for a gas station immediately and was grateful to be able to pull over within a few minutes to refuel...Dayenu.   But once I got out of the car to use the pump, the credit card reader wouldn't work...but there was a nice young man willing to help me...Dayenu.  Then the pump itself wouldn't work...again another helpful attendant...Dayenu.  By the time I reached church I had had a string of small Dayenu moments so long that I had forgotten about the time.

I was surprised when I walked into church and discovered that somehow I had made the trip (which normally takes 25-30 minutes) in 12 minutes. And no, I did not speed.  Speeding is impossible with 21 stoplights between here and there (and yes, I did count them on my way home).  My partner in conducting the services had had a very similar experience on her way to church.  An important call for help from a beloved daughter overseas, no time to spare, too much time to make up, and yet she too arrived at church much before she expected.  As we sat there looking at the circle of participants gathering for the service, waiting for the clock to move towards our start time...it was clear that we had both experienced the gift of time expanding to meet our needs.  Later we did discover that the church clock was a bit slow...but nowhere near the almost 15 minutes that were given to us that morning....Dayenu.

I am learning that Dayenu is not just a benediction of gratitude on divine gifts received from a generous God, but a posture for walking in this world. 

It is not enough to say, "well gosh God, thanks for the exodus from Egypt, but what the heck are we supposed to do here in the middle of the desert without food or water?"

Dayenu is a space of "dear God, if all you would have done were to deliver us from Pharoah, it would have been enough...but to show us your love in enabling us to make that trip in fellowship and to have arrived here at the edge of the sea where we can bathe our dusty feet....Dayenu.   And the sea parted.

There are thousands of moments in each day, moments when our lives may seem to look like we are sitting in the sand with Pharoah and his men bearing down on us with a vengence. Days when we feel as if we are trapped between the desert of disappointed human hopes, and a sea of fear so vast we feel paralyzed and immobile...but that is a moment for a song...a song of Dayenu.

Try staying in the temple of Dayenu today...it's a lovely place to dwell. And in this space, you don't have to choose a Jewish God, or a Christian God, or a Muslim, God or a Buddhist God....you can have them all...in One.   The One whose name is I AM, El Shaddhai, Jehovah, and Love....mostly, for me, Love.

And since I couldn't find a good version of the song "Dayenu" on Youtube, I will leave you with this song of praise from Amy Grant's, "El Shaddai."  It is one of my favorties ever.  It is a prayer.  I will list the lyrics below.

And if you need help thinking through how your day is filled with moments of Dayenu: "Even if God only ______, it would have been enough" just give me a call.  Together we can have our own moment of "El Shaddai." There's nothing I'd rather share with a friend.

"El shaddai, el shaddai,
El-elyon na adonia,
Age to age youre still the same,
By the power of the name.
El shaddai, el shaddai,
Erkamka na adonai,
We will praise and lift you high,
El shaddai.

Through your love and through the ram,
You saved the son of abraham;
Through the power of your hand,
Turned the sea into dry land.
To the outcast on her knees,
You were the God who really sees,
And by your might,
You set your children free.

El shaddai, el shaddai,
El-elyon na adonia,
Age to age youre still the same,
By the power of the name.
El shaddai, el shaddai,
Erkamka na adonai,
We will praise and lift you high,
El shaddai.

Through the years youve made it clear,
That the time of christ was near,
Though the people couldnt see
What messiah ought to be.
Though your word contained the plan,
They just could not understand
Your most awesome work was done
Through the frailty of your son.

El shaddai, el shaddai,
El-elyon na adonai,
Age to age youre still the same,
By the power of the name.
El shaddai, el shaddai,
Erkamka na adonai,
I will praise yo till I die,
El shaddai.

El shaddai, el shaddai,
El-elyon na adonai,
Age to age youre still the same,
By the power of the name.
El shaddai, el shaddai,
Erkamka na adonai,
I will praise you till I die.
El shaddai."

with Love,

Kate