"Love isn't something that we find...."

"Love isn't something
that we find,
it's something that we do...”

Clint Black's 1997 love song,  "Something That We Do"  often comes to me when I am reading the gospels. It always makes me think of Jesus' life. Love wasn't in his words, it was the "how" of his living.

And even though Clint wrote this song about his marriage, it speaks to many paradigms about Love.  Love for our children, those we serve, fellow church members, work colleagues, neighbors, and yes, significant others and spouses.  Even love for our jobs, communities, employers, public servants.

Today, for me, it addresses the lie that love is waiting for the right object for its affections -- in order to fully be itself.  Waiting for the right person or situation to come along.   Or that we have a choice about whether (or not) to love, what to love, when to love, or who to love.  That we have the capacity to assesses something (or someone's) deserving and then we have the right to decide whether to extend affections. Love is not a choice. Love is not a reward to dole out.  This passage from Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy is, for me, so clarifying and assuring:

"Life is, always has been,
and ever will be independent
of matter; for Life is God..."

So, you might wonder, how does that related to Love? Well, Love and Life are synonymous [Webster: "one directly implies the other'] So to say that Life is independent of matter, also implies that Love is independent of person, place, or circumstance.

Love -- true Love -- is not dependent on anything. Love is self-existent. Love does not assess deserving, and then choose what it will bestow its affection upon. Just as the sun does not choose what to shine on. Love, like the sun, is impartial about the object of its expression. It loves, because it can do no less. Love that can be stopped, averted, decreased, or managed -- is not Love. It might be a sense of human affection or personal bestowal -- but it is not Love.

Leonard Nimoy once wrote:

"If Love can be withdrawn,
it never was."

I can't think of a truer statement about love.

Now we might -- out of love for someone -- step back from the immediacy of a relationship, and let growth occur, or we might let there be space for deeper listening, self-examination, or a shift in the shape of that love and the role we each play. We might feel Love-led to release someone from a human sense of belonging to us, for a deeper sense of trust in God's appointing and anointing. But make no mistake, Love itself cannot be withdrawn -- it is invariable and eternal. The love that once was, always will be. Love isn't something we control humanly, it is the spiritual power that controls us.

Love isn't waiting for us to find the right person, to manage it as a resource, or control it like a bank account. Love is so much more than a human emotion which we find, fall into, or fight for -- or against. Love is the ultimate power working in us. Moving us into alignment with God's purpose for us.

Love uses us. We don't use Love.  We don't apply it, or decide to repress it.  Love is more powerful than our decisions, aims, or adaptations.  Love is everything.  Or as Mary Baker Eddy tells us in her poem, "Love:"

"Love alone is Life..."

Love is not a choice, it is not a decision, it is not a reward, it is not a gift. Love is the ultimate power of God working in us - governing, guiding, impelling, silencing. Love is the great imperative. It is our Life.

offered with Love,

Cate

"Let My love open the door...to your heart..."

"...Let my love open the door
Let my love open the door
Let my love open the door
To your heart..."
- Peter Townsend

It echoed through the silence.  "Let my love open the door, let my love open the door, let my love open the door...to your heart..."  Enter power chords. 

Silence is like that for me these days.  Filled with messages.  I have to trust that they are messages from God, Mind...or I am going bonkers.  Either way it's compelling and comforting.  Like I said...either God or bonkers.

I choose God.

Yesterday was all about choosing....and not choosing.  Mostly about choosing to not choose. 

I was sitting on the patio of Leonard Gallery in the 90 degree heat of an early summer day, high on the bluffs above the lazy waters of the wide Mississippi River.  I had my toes in the wall fountain and I was just listening for my Father's voice.

The thoughts that came were clear and pointed...arresting and arousing the lethargy of a hot summer's day.  

It started with a question.  It always does. I think this is why the beatitude says, "Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst..."  It's the questioning that most assures me of God's presence, as love, in my heart.  It tells me in no uncertain terms that He wants me to leap out of complacency into the life-quenching cup of cold water that is His refreshing and invigorating Truth.

So, His question in my heart was, "How do I live on purpose without everything becoming all about outcomes...successes and failures that are really ego-driven mortal measurements.  If life is all about the journey of discovery, what then does it mean to live on purpose?  How, and more importantly - why, should I show up in my life with a clear sense of purpose...if my purpose is to live free of outcomes and in discovery?"  Hmmm...

The answer started as a question.  "What is My purpose?"  Don't you just love this God of ours!

And the answer to that question popped into my heart so quickly it shook the ground beneath my feet.  "I AM that I AM...is my purpose." 

I sat with that simple statement of divine purpose for only moments before God began explaining Herself.  "I am what I am.  That is enough for me...and it should be enough for you. I am Love, what more could you ever want me to be?  I have no choice in this matter.  I cannot choose to be the absence of myself.  I cannot choose to be less loving...merciful, unconditional, impartial...than being the All-loving requires by its very nature and character.  If I could choose to be less than myself, why would you long for me, seek my face, ache for my presence in your life."

God went through every one of Her names...Mind, Life, Truth, Principle, Soul, Spirit..in just this way.  Less than all Truth...just a measure of Mind....a dash of Principle??? 

Then as I sat there, everything around me continued the lesson, I watched the water flowing down from the top of the fountain, running through my toes and pooling in the base of the fountain waiting to be recycled over and over again.

That water doesn't choose to be refreshing...or nourishing, thirst-quenching, cleansing, purifying, oxidizing, power-generating, sanctifying, or beautiful.  It only shows up as a water molecule that unites with other water molecules and gains weight and form, interacts with the laws of gravity, unites in purpose with the surface it rests upon, comes in contact with my toes...and voila, refreshing, cooling, beautiful dancing-in-the-sunlight water.

It has no sense of good or bad outcomes.  It trusts the one who sent it along its way...on a journey of self-discovery...to plan the next adventure.  Had it been sent through a hose it might have discovered something very different about itself as force (under pressure), nourishment (to the grass), beauty (as dancers rushing and twirling through the air).

But the water molecule never had a choice...why would she want one.  Wasn't being H2O just the most perfect thing for a water molecule to be!!

The world is constantly telling us that we can make choices that result in mistakes and missteps that lead to misunderstandings and missed opportunities.  But that's only if we think we have a mind separate from God, and that our purpose is to control this errant mind.

I'm just not buying it.

I think I am going to practice living like the water...and trust the one who made me to hold me in His hand and spill me onto a sun-scorched earth, sprinkle me on a baby's forehead, quench the thirst of a parched traveler, or pool me, in fellowship with others, within a carved-out stone...petros.. for the weary wanderer to wash his feet in. 

Time for more silence...I think I will let Your love open the door to my heart...no one sings this song like Pete Townsend...enjoy,
Kate
Kate Robertson, CS

"But it's your kindness that I love best..."

"...I love your vision of the future
Your hope that never dies
But it's your kindness
That clears my skies..."
David Wilcox
"Kindness"
(click on the title just above to see a video of this song)

My sister Fawn sent me this little story recently:

"One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.

He said: 'My son, the battle is between 'two wolves' inside us all. One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

The grandson thought about it for a minute, and then asked his grandfather: 'Which wolf wins?'

The old Cherokee simply replied: 'The one you feed.'"

What I love about this story is the separation the grandfather makes between the individual...and the wolves.  It's not a new concept...how many times in old Tom & Jerry cartoons do we see the big tomcat with a horned demon on one shoulder, and an angel on the other, each trying to convince him of their point of view or position...torment little Jerry, or let him go?

I have been thinking about this today in light of a recent conversation with a friend about social responsibility. 

When I am presented with options...pay my taxes or not, support legislation that would ban same-sex marriage - or not, protest the freedom to bear arms - or not, give the man on the corner money for a sandwich - or not, go the speed limit at 4 AM on an empty stretch of highway - or not, get myself out the door to serve at a homeless shelter, or stay home in my jammies and read the NYTimes (hmmm...) ...I am trying to ask myself "what am I feeding" with my choices.   Will I be contributing to a climate of greed or generosity, fear or love, manipulative control or trust, cultural disparity or unity, humanity or insanity, compassion or disdain, equality or superiority, universal freedom or the enslavement of other for the profiting of the privileged, war or peace, service or indulgence, divisiveness or cooperation...in myself, or in the world?

In asking myself these questions, I keep coming back to the internal battle between the two "wolves" (or sheep and goats) that Jesus describes, and Matthew records, in the New Testament:

"When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory.  And before him shall be gathered all nations, and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats.  And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.

Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, "Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.  For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat.  I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink.  I was a stranger, and ye took me in.  Naked, and ye clothed me.  I was sick, and ye visited me.  I was in prison, and ye came unto me."

Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, "Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed thee?  Or thirsty, and gave thee drink?  When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in?   Or naked, and clothed thee?  Or when saw we thee sick?  Or in prison, and came unto thee?"

And the King shall answer and say unto them, "Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, "Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels.  For I was an hungered, and ye gave me no meat.  I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink.  I was a stranger, and ye took me not in.  Naked, and ye clothed me not.  Sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not."

Then shall they also answer him, saying, "Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?"

Then shall he answer them, saying, "Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me."

And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal."

So I have to ask myself, "Who are "the least of these" that I must care for?  What would make me feel that I am responsible for the cares, woes, education, and shelter of MY daughters, but not the child and her battered mother - sleeping in a Detroit homeless shelter, or the man begging on the streets of Calcutta?"

What concepts about myself, and my relationship to the world around me, am I feeding?  One of universal and impartial goodness - abundant resources that we are entrusted with for the care and feeding of humanity, or one of privilege and partiality based on opportunity, race, education, religion, geography, cultural history?  What language do I think God's angels use to guide my actions -- generosity, abundance, charity, freedom, compassion, hope...or greed, fear, blindness, pride, resentment, arrogance?

I don't think these questions are about politics, nationalism, haves and/or have nots.  Politics and rhetoric would distract us from the real choices.  And it is not about choosing a party, a leader, a position, a side, or a dogma.  The real choice lies in which wolf...which voice...we are going to feed within ourselves.  And we must not judge one another.  Only the listener knows whether his (or her) speech and actions are the result of feeding one wolf, or the other, moment-by-moment.  And I don't know about you, but I have too much that I need to be alert to in my own heart, to try and police the thoughts, motives, or actions of another.  So,  I choose to trust that each of my brothers and sisters is feeding the wolf that they want to see grow stronger in themselves, and in the world.

"...I love your wisdom
Your knowledge of the past
Your willingness to listen
Your taste for what will last

I love your compassion for the suffering
And your solid happiness
But it's your kindness
That I love the best..."

Thank you David (and Fawn)...you have both reminded me, once again, of what is truly beautiful in this world...and I am grateful,

Kate
Kate Robertson, CS

"Baby mine..."

"Baby mine, don't you cry.
Baby mine, dry your eyes.
Rest your head close to my heart,
never to part, baby of mine..."
-Churchhill/Washington

These lyrics from "Baby Mine" which Mama Jumbo sings to her baby in Disney's Dumbo, leave me speechless (and weeping) everytime I hear them.  In an instant I am transported back to a day that is etched on my heart indelibly. I am sitting in the back of an enormous Land Rover in the middle of the the African bush on photographic safari.  It is late Spring and we are less than fifty yards from a mother elephant and her baby.  Our guide reminds us that rampant poaching has made this picture of African serenity rare.   I am holding my three week old daughter in my arms and the connection between the four of us...mama elephant and her baby, me and my daughter...echoes across the veld and through the dry red African air like a call to prayer.  This song sweeps across my heart and I am as taken apart by it then as I was the first time I heard it in a dark Marshalltown, Iowa movie theatre when I was 8. 

These are not animated Disney characters.  There are no colorful circus tents, talking giraffes, dancing crows, or silly clowns that would soften the blow of watching a mother elephant being taken from her child.  The love is very real here.  I can actually feel the tenderness that flows through the soft curl of her trunk around her baby's chest.  It is as if we share some primordial energy causing my arm to softly curve beneath my daughter's back when I see her trunk tighten around her baby's foreleg.  We are two women and two babies.  We are mothers and daughters, devoted parent and child, trusting infant and Love-impelled mom.  There is no hierarchy of species, there is no sophistry in our communication.  We are moved by something divine...

here is the poem that fell onto the page that night...I found it in an old journal today...

loving you is not a
choice

it is a divine imperative

it is
an insistent demand

a
moment of undeniable
spiritual impulsion
on
the sea of our
deepest inner longings

it is the
coincidence
of the human and the divine

the
"as in heaven…
     so on earth"

the Word
     made flesh

the kingdom of heaven
within

the Emmanuel
    or
"God with us"…in me

it is all that is
good
and pure
and
holy
in
the universe

it is the
holy kiss

the
song
of
Solomon

it is voice of
the turtle
heard in our land

it is
the desire
that is prayer

the sweet agony of
Gethsemane,
Calvary…..
          the morning meal
          on the shores
          of the Gallilean Sea

loving you is not
a choice

loving you
came
in an
empty manger
cold and
lonely
yet
full of
grace

loving you
is not a choice

it is as
choiceless as
the flower turning
toward the light

the leaf
turning its
veins to the rain

the roots
digging deeper for
water

the dew
lifting
to echo
the open
call
of the sun's
demand for morning

it is a force
from within

the sweet pull
of
the moon upon
the water's body
of complacency
making  it
kiss the
shore in
a crescendo
of foam
and fury


loving you is not
a choice
it is
free of
decision…
reason…
pros and cons…
hypothetical "what ifs"

It is…
simply…
what is

i love you "baby mine"...
Mum