"I have felt you with my spirit,
I have felt you fill this room...
And this is just an invitation,
just a sample of the whole...
And I cannot wait to be going home..."
I love Sara Groves' "Going Home." I sense that she might be writing about her hope of experiencing "the rapture," much the way I used to feel about going home to camp. The rest of the year I was either anticipating going to camp, or reveling in all I'd just learned, and expereinced, at camp.
At the time, I thought it was "healthy." I thought I knew where I belonged, where I was "at my best," and although I convinced myself that I could carry "camp" with me throughout the year as a place in my heart...I still spent waaayyy too much time dreaming about "the valley" (the Arkansas Valley of Colorado where camp sits in the palm of a series of avalanched chutes called "Columbia Basin'), and my freindships there.
But one day, after listening to Sara's song, I realized that I waited for my weeks at Adventure Unlimited, the way Sara's song referred to the rapturous experience of "going home." And as much I tried to "live" camp wherever I was, I was still thinking that my camp experience was better when I was sitting on a porch looking out over the Midland Range across the brow of a rock formation called, "Sleeping Indian."
So, I got after it, the way I would start to wrestle with any concept that no longer resonated with me spiritually. And there were two statements that began to inform my prayers. One was from the book of Luke in the Bible:
"And when Jesus was demanded of the Pharisees, when the kingdom of God should come, he answered them and said, The kingdom of God cometh not with observation: Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, Lo there! for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you."
and from Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy:
"In divine Science, where prayers are mental, all may avail themselves of God as "a very present help in trouble." Love is impartial and universal in its adaptation and bestowals."
I began to see that, for me, if the kingdom of God was not, here or there, but within me; it really didn't matter where I was...I could always be at my best, satisfied, peaceful, And not only could I be at my best, there was a spiritual demand upon me to be at my best and not live in anticipation of, or longing for, a better place, a better time, a more condusive enviroment for spiritual living and scientific Christian practice. Love, God, is impartial and universal...and by reflection, my loving has to be completely, utterly, absolutely impartial and universally adaptable in its bestowing to be "like Him."
So, although I am deeply happy to be here in the valley, and to make this my basecamp, my homebase...a touchstone for the moment...I now know, that I really can be home anywhere. I know "the rapture" of a unverse teeming with God's presence and overflowing with Her Love.
Here is the poem that escaped, like a gasp of realization, as this truth dawned in full moonlight....
"rapture: [from medeival Latin raptura to seize and carry off]
(noun) a feeling of intense pleasure or joy;
(verb) to transport from earth to heaven at the coming of Christ;
to be raised or lifted out of oneself by divine power."
i have known
it comes in the
silent hunger of a
yearns to know and
there is a moment,
where we finally surrender to grace,
and are caught up,
carried into the weightless,
space of spiritual trust...
when knowing the answer
is less important
than feeling like a child
in the arms of a
it is enough.
it is peace,
it is bliss,
but without reason...
it is poised
it is flight but
without the beating of
and still rising,
of the unseen...
it is light holding hands with
the darkness and together
watching the changing faces of
the moon like
in the presence of
a divine surprise,
I hope you find the rapture in every moment of your oneness with God...today.
Here is another link to Sara's song, "Going Home."