"I will be like Mother Mary
with a blessing in my soul,
and I will give the world my eyes
so they can see..."
- Jason Robert Brown
Maria sent me a video clip of "Christmas Lullaby" the other day. Watching it brought home a Christmas question I've been walking with for the past few weeks.
It goes something like this:
"What is it that you are "great with" today?"
It comes from a Bible verse in the book of Luke that says:
"And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child."
I remember what it felt like to be "great with child." I remember the sense of wonder with each tiny, fluttering butterfly kick. I remember the expectancy, the delight, the deep cherishing of our child's identity. I remember knowing...with my entire being...that this child was pure, holy, complete, good. I remember feeling absolutely focused with purpose and vision. Whether I was carrying a child under my ribs, or in my heart during an adoptive journey, the fullness of love, devotion, and clarity were the same.
So I am asking myself...moment-by-moment....what is it that you are carrying expectantly, with joy, vision, hope, and grace. What is it you are "great with" right now.
And since it is clear to me that my only purpose is to just show up...each and every second...completely willing to love what is in the space of "Thy will be done,"...the answers are flowing, and growing, and flowering by the moment.
Here is just a sampling of the 'babes" I have been pregnant, or "great with" with this week:
- I am great with hope for humanity, our planet, all creatures.
- I am great with "a fervent desire for growth in grace, to be expressed in patience, meekness, love, and good deeds."
- I am great with a desire to live a love that "is impartial and universal in its adaptation and bestowals."
- I am great with a deep hunger for questions that lead me, not to answers that are steeped in certainty, but to questions that foster compassion and understanding.
- I am great with delight in each paradox as it unfolds new views of divinity placed, like a hidden gift, in humanity.
- I am great with a longing for childlike pleasures and treasures...dancing, laughing, a smooth stone, a construction paper chain, a perfect snowflake on a piece of burlap.
- I am great with a keen awareness that kindness is the gold standard, that humility is the highest ambition, and that wholeness is the only measure of a man...every man, woman, and child...all creatures, great and small.
- I am great with gratitude for each moment of life...and the opportunities it affords for living love.
- I am great with a desire to breathe out a blessing with every thought exhaled.
- I am great with a love for silence...in the storm, and in the solace of a cloistered heart.
- I am great with contentment...satisfied by "conscious worth"....to know the simple gifts of consciousness, to be aware of the thoughts, questions, ideas, images of beauty...the love in my heart.
- I am great with abandon, utter surrender...letting go of the need to become...become better, become improved, become something...and just be.
- I am great with the abundant resources that afford me the opportunity to be generous with all that I have...humility, simplicity, creativity, modesty... and not focused on what I have-not.
- I am great with the extravagant joy of just being good...it is enough.
These are just of few of the babes that I have been nurturing, cherishing, and stroking my hand over, as they dance within the belly of my full heart. These are the "spiritually mature" ideas I am loving forward into a waiting, expectant, eager family of Love. These are the children of promise I am holding close, while they sing to me a lullaby of peace, in the night.
Mary Baker Eddy twice quotes Shakespeare in her counsel to those who wished to grow in the graces of spirit:
"Great not like Caesar ,
stained with blood,
But only great as I am good."
Oh to be good. Not great, but great with goodness. It is enough.
all love to each of you...may you be great with, big with, pregnant with infinite blessings, and may the "babe of Christian healing" fill your life with purpose and hope....
Kate Robertson, CS
[many of the quoted statements above are familiars, loved phrases and sentences from the writings of Mary Baker Eddy that have become as dear to me as most loved friends.]