"Love isn't something that we find...."

"Love isn't something
that we find,
it's something that we do...”

Clint Black's 1997 love song,  "Something That We Do"  often comes to me when I am reading the gospels. It always makes me think of Jesus' life. Love wasn't in his words, it was the "how" of his living.

And even though Clint wrote this song about his marriage, it speaks to many paradigms about Love.  Love for our children, those we serve, fellow church members, work colleagues, neighbors, and yes, significant others and spouses.  Even love for our jobs, communities, employers, public servants.

Today, for me, it addresses the lie that love is waiting for the right object for its affections -- in order to fully be itself.  Waiting for the right person or situation to come along.   Or that we have a choice about whether (or not) to love, what to love, when to love, or who to love.  That we have the capacity to assesses something (or someone's) deserving and then we have the right to decide whether to extend affections. Love is not a choice. Love is not a reward to dole out.  This passage from Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy is, for me, so clarifying and assuring:

"Life is, always has been,
and ever will be independent
of matter; for Life is God..."

So, you might wonder, how does that related to Love? Well, Love and Life are synonymous [Webster: "one directly implies the other'] So to say that Life is independent of matter, also implies that Love is independent of person, place, or circumstance.

Love -- true Love -- is not dependent on anything. Love is self-existent. Love does not assess deserving, and then choose what it will bestow its affection upon. Just as the sun does not choose what to shine on. Love, like the sun, is impartial about the object of its expression. It loves, because it can do no less. Love that can be stopped, averted, decreased, or managed -- is not Love. It might be a sense of human affection or personal bestowal -- but it is not Love.

Leonard Nimoy once wrote:

"If Love can be withdrawn,
it never was."

I can't think of a truer statement about love.

Now we might -- out of love for someone -- step back from the immediacy of a relationship, and let growth occur, or we might let there be space for deeper listening, self-examination, or a shift in the shape of that love and the role we each play. We might feel Love-led to release someone from a human sense of belonging to us, for a deeper sense of trust in God's appointing and anointing. But make no mistake, Love itself cannot be withdrawn -- it is invariable and eternal. The love that once was, always will be. Love isn't something we control humanly, it is the spiritual power that controls us.

Love isn't waiting for us to find the right person, to manage it as a resource, or control it like a bank account. Love is so much more than a human emotion which we find, fall into, or fight for -- or against. Love is the ultimate power working in us. Moving us into alignment with God's purpose for us.

Love uses us. We don't use Love.  We don't apply it, or decide to repress it.  Love is more powerful than our decisions, aims, or adaptations.  Love is everything.  Or as Mary Baker Eddy tells us in her poem, "Love:"

"Love alone is Life..."

Love is not a choice, it is not a decision, it is not a reward, it is not a gift. Love is the ultimate power of God working in us - governing, guiding, impelling, silencing. Love is the great imperative. It is our Life.

offered with Love,

Cate